Have you ever wanted to be able to read someone’s personality at a glance?  To be able to decide who’s worth the time and who’d just be a waste of effort before building up a relationship with them?

Before a date it was common for young women to be given the following advice:  “Watch how he treats the server when giving his order, receiving his food, and settling the bill.”  The idea was, while their date may be dressed to impress, watching how he treated others could be more telling about the man behind the polished exterior.  This advice is valuable for so much more than just dates.

Observing how someone interacts with serving staff, subordinates, or even enemies, reveals their character.  Are they fair?  How do they handle others’ mistakes? Their own mistakes? Do they stand up for themselves?  Do they admit when they are wrong?  Most importantly do you like what you see?

These observations show how future interactions with that person will play out when they’re no long trying to make a good impression.  That way you can decide if you’d be willing to be on the receiving end of their interactions with people, or if you would even be willing to be seen with them when they act like that.  I certainly have no interest in being seen with an adult that throws a full on tantrum.

Taking that a step further you can find out if you’re able to talk to them about these interactions, or if they retreat and minimize the situation.  If you don’t even feel comfortable attempting this step then that’s definitely a red flag.  This way you can identify tiresome interactions before they become unbearable.  But it’s not all doom and gloom.

The people that are quiet are often very subtle in how they shine.  Watching for those little moments helps us to find the people we want to spend time with.  Those who are considerate, kind, and willing to enter into deeper discussions.  You might be surprised at what you observe, and when you see those actions you like say something.

Say thank you for being so kind, attentive, or for just being them.  Tell them how it makes your day better.  Look for the people you enjoy being with and appreciate them for it.  It’s a good way to live a happier life.

So what small act warmed your heart recently?  Did someone give up their place in line?  What about just giving a smile at the right time?  Let me know in the comments below.

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